The clock strikes 430AM. I’m Sitting here in this room all alone. Corsair is snoring in his bedroom. The cat, Rosie, is purring loudly as I pet him to sleep. It’s so peaceful and quiet. I should be asleep myself, but I am too deep in thought. Just sitting here thinking of the past and what happened last year. I remember those days. It seems like just yesterday. I was only 17, no 16 when my life started to go down the path it is in today. My parents would say it when I started making bad choices. I would say it was when I started to stand up for myself and sook acceptance. Here are a few facts about my past you might not know:
1. I was 16 when I first found out about same-sex couples and marriage
2. I hit puberty at the age of 11.5 and that made me wonder about sex
3. I had only known about sex between man and woman until I was 16.
4. I had anger issues in my early teen years and it was out of control. I held a knife to my mom’s chest once when I was 14 because I was having one of those anger moments and she was in my way.
5. I was abusive to my mom when I was a teenager and called her a bitch and other names, but my mom still loved me. She just gave up on me when I came out of the closet because I guess she didn’t want to have a gay son who was a crossdresser.
6. I came out of the closet when I was 17. Six months before my 18th birthday. I told my mom I was gay and wanted to be a drag queen and she lost it then as I said before.
7. I almost ended up in jail and on the sex offender list when I was 16 for sticking my finger up a female dog’s vagina. It’s a long story as to why I did this, but basically I did it because I was curious on how a vagina felt. Don’t judge me, please!!!! I am very sorry about it and there was no harm done (the dog liked it) but I AM SORRY ABOUT IT!!!!
8. I spent almost my whole 17th year in the mental hospital and in a treatment center. This was for the dog and because I was cutting myself and half suicidal.
9. I had a camera in my early teen years and made a mini video show called “Jonathan’s life in a crazy family” and it was a hit for me because I made up to 100 videos of me cooking,singing, baking, or cleaning. It was so much fun for me. I wish I put them on YouTube but my parents wouldn’t let me
10. I was homeschooled my whole teen years.
11. I ran away from home a lot in my early teen years, but always found my way home. I also went to the mental hospital a lot when I was 16.
12. I was diagnosed with Bipolar and Depression when I was 16.
13. I created a cookbook in my early teen years. I was a very creative person in the kitchen and then my mom killed the creativity when she told me I could no longer create stuff in the kitchen.
14. I was scared of my dad in my teen years. I wouldn’t talk to him or ask any help from him because I was so scared he was going to hurt me.
15. I sang a lot when I was a teenager and my little sister, Tiffany was my backup vocal. We had the best times together 😉
16. My brothers and I had never got along when I was a teenager. They hated me. I loved them to death and still do!
17. I was a very good organizer/janitor when I was a teenager ( I still am!!).
18. I journaled everyday in my early teens. I still have those journals! I have six full journals! I still journal, as you can see. It’s just more public now
19. I kissed 3 girls in my early teens. All them left me and told me I was gay.
20. I wanted to be 18 so bad when I was a teen. Ha! Well, now I wish I could go back and change a few things.
21. I made a bucket list when I was 16. I lost that list, but I’m pretty sure I’m gonna be making a new one soon 😉
22. I was a very religious spiritual teen
23. I got baptized in the Seventh Day Adventist Church when I was 14.
24. My favorite subject in highschool was Bible and I got an plus in it!!
25. I took a lot of photographs when I was a teen. I still would if I had a camera!!
Phew! I think that’s enough memories!! Hope y’all enjoyed and please don’t judge me. I had my reasons and now am A better sane person!! Thanks for reading! Goodnite 😉
-Jonathan S Fisher