Jonathan S Fisher's Life Adventures

Posts tagged ‘GRCC’

Life in California…..so far

Hey Readers,

So I’ve been in Los Angeles, California for 3 weeks and 5 days. A lot has happened. I know I gave a short brief description on why I was moving and it seemed like a pretty short post. Sorry about that, but you have to understand I was on the bus at the time and I couldn’t concentrate worth squat! Even as I write this post, I may not finish it completely because I only have so much time. So I will do my best.  I love my readers and my followers and thankyou for bearing with me.

So yeah, I took the bus from Grand Rapids, Michigan to Los Angeles, California. It was a 2 day and six-hour trip. I rode the Greyhound bus and we stopped many stops including Chicago, Phoenix, Santa Fe (New Mexico), and many others. I think the best stop was at Oklahoma City because that was when I got out of the bus to stretch and realized I could take my winter jacket off because it was warm weather there (lol……Fuck Michigan weather). It was a fun trip and I did a lot of sleeping and personal reflection. I couldn’t believe I had moved and that I was actually throwing myself to the lions. I felt brave and like I had a major change that was needed in my life. I was pursuing my dreams and I was letting go of everything and leaving my past behind and moving miles away where I would possibly be  alone for weeks at a time.

So I showed up at the bus station Sunday afternoon, 330pm. I was scared and didn’t know where to go. A guy named Andy was supposed to pick me up and  show me around and then take me to a homeless shelter nearby. He didn’t and I was stuck at Greyhound for about two hours just crying and scared. I had no clue where to go and I was frightened. I knew I was in the middle of downtown and close to Skid Row (Which is 100% unsafe and sick). So, after 2 hours I headed over to the McDonald’s just nearby to use the wi-fi there. I sat there for an hour hitting up the gay men there desperately asking for a ride to the nearest shelter and to be shown around. I got no replies. Then I got this strange text. It read “Hey dude, it’s me, Angel. I am out downtown and was wondering if you needed any help? Let me know”. I done freaked out and told this strange guy named “Angel” everything. He told me to sit tight and that he’d be there in 15 minutes.

30 minutes passed and I was worried he had forgotten. I was highly uncomfortable at this time to leave because by then it was 7pm and the sun had set and it was dark out. I saw the homeless man standing outside begging for money and when he saw that I had $20 he asked me for it and I told him no (Wasn’t it enough I looked homeless myself because I had so many bags next to me!? Obviously not. Or he seriously was mentally challenged). Once I told him no he kept walking back and forth around the building. I couldn’t help but think that he would jump me the minute I left the building. So I stay put still petrified. Well, 45 minutes late, Angel showed up with a woman by his side (which I learned later on was Erika) and asked if I was Jonathan. I said yes and he asked how long I had been sitting there for. I told him 3 hours and he asked me where I was from. I then told him my story and he told me to get my stuff and to hop in the car with him.

We rode all the way to his friend’s house. She seemed nice and I thought they were a couple. As soon as we got to their house, Angel explained to me he was gay and that the girl was his best friend, Erica. He then proceeded to tell me he had some errands to run, but that he would be right back to show me around town. I was ok with it because Erica seemed nice and I was also introduced to Brooke, who was her room-mate. So as Angel went to run his errands I talked to Erica. I found out that she herself was Andrew Christian’s Photographer and a professional photographer. As Brooke was a professional wedding planner. I loved these girls. They seemed really chill and they listened to my story and felt Very optimistic for me.

Angel returned and we then proceeded to take a tour of “Korea Town” near downtown Los Angeles. Angel told me probably the best place I could crash at for that night was at the library (The Filipe Denave Branch…or something like that) and also showed me where to get a month bus pass. We all stopped at a sushi shop for dinner and talked a little more and then we returned to the house. Erica decided to put on “The Little Mermaid” and we watched that half way through.  Then I decided it was time for me to leave. So Angel and I took a few of my bags  and he walked  me to the library. He wanted to have sex with me because he gave me that look and asked if there was anything else he could do for me. I wasn’t thinking on the same term and just said no.

So there I had it! I slept on the sidewalk at the library that night and that was the way it was for the next 7 days for me. I didn’t mind it at all because I was free to do whatever I wanted for that day and I could leave my sleeping bag  at the same place and it wouldn’t disappear. I discovered West Hollywood within the next three days. I also Visited Santa Monica Pier/Beach and I also took my first subway train. I was having fun!! I also was very enthusiastic when I discovered West Hollywood (Or WeHo) and the Lesbian And Gay Youth Center on Highland. I knew that this was where I belonged because I could once more feel comfortable cross dressing and being feminine if I wanted.  I’ve got to say I loved my first week in Hollywood because I discovered a lot and I also became quite confident that this is where I belong.

Then week two rolled along. My life quickly changed. I was hanging out in WeHo on Sunday afternoon and put an ad on Craigslist looking for sex because I was horny. Well, this guy by the name of Dan emailed me back and asked if I could host. I told him no. I think he got suspicious so he started asking where I was staying at. I first lied to him saying I had an apartment downtown, but then I ended up telling the real truth. He freaked out and told me he had help coming to get me. I was like ok. Next thing you know A place called “Covenant House California” came up and picked me up. They asked me questions and gave me dinner. Then they gave me a bed for the night and told me to see Outreach in the morning to get a permanent bed in the program for 90 days.

The next day I saw outreach and did a bunch of paperwork. They had to call my mom and confirm I wasn’t welcome back home in Pennsylvania.  We had to wait three hours. My mom called back and in an angry voice said I wasn’t welcome back. Supposively she also gave the reasons why, which we all know.  I was a little emotionally upset over this the next few days, but got over it.  So we did the paperwork and got me into a bed for 90 days.

So that’s where I have been the past two weeks. Been living in this homeless shelter just chilling, looking for jobs, and other things. I’ve made a couple of lesbian friends. And I may not like it here, but at least i get to take two showers, do my laundry (free), and eat 3 meals a day. Plus, I have a case manager that meets me everyday and we discuss my career options and what to do that day. Plus I have free access to health services.

Well, got to go but will write later. Bye.

-Jonathan  S Fisher

 

weho time

 

 

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Los Angeles, California Here We come!

It’s funny how things can change in an instant, and that’s what happened with me. Ok, so Obviously by the title you can already tell I am moving to Los Angeles, California. Yes, I am and how did this come to be? Well, let’s start at the beginning. So, as I mentioned in the previous post I was and still am failing in classes. I tried really hard and I even got a tutor, Jonathan Jackson. I was still three weeks behind and I know I missed at least a week of class because I was sick. So, with that I had decided enough was enough and planned on dropping out. I know I am on financial aid and that I will have to pay back $10 Grand, but even then if I continued to attend class I would’ve recieved a grade of E and had my financial aid suspended. So, with that I was gonna have to drop out either way.

It’s not only about the financial aid issue,  it was also some deep thinking I did and what a methhead told me. So, there was this one night when I met this guy, Damon P. Rodriguez, who needed a place to stay for the night. So I met him and talked to him for a couple of hours to make sure he was safe. Then I offered for him to crash at my place for the night because he seemed really nice and chill (the only downfalls: He was a methhead and he was HIV Poz….which didn’t bother me. I told him just to not do the drugs in the house and if we did have sex it’d have to be with two condoms). So he stayed at my house overnight and we were actually up 2am talking about my life.  When I had got home with him, my landlord (Norman Bouma) was yelling at me saying I needed to get out and couldn’t have company over any longer. Him and I were yelling at each other because I was like I get 30 days to leave and he was like I want you out tonight. So Damon stepped in and told him I had 30 days and to leave me alone.

I went to my bedroom and was crying. I was “whining” as Damon put it. He said that I had a pretty messed up life and that I was headed in the wrong direction. I asked him what he meant and he said if I wanted to be a PopStar/MovieActor/Model that going to school was not going to help. Yes, I would learn stuff but in the end I wouldn’t need it. He also said I should consider moving to Hollywood and auditioning there because I’d have more luck there than in Grand Rapids, Michigan. So with that, I started the process of thinking about my options I had. I stayed up for 4 nights in a row packing my bags trying to figure out what to do. I questioned myself: Do I really want to do this? Do I really want to move all the way out to the west? Do I really want to move so far away that there may be a chance that I won’t ever see my family again? Do I really want to face the possibly of paying $10K  and possibly end up in jail if I don’t pay it back? I ask these few question plus many more and thought about it real hard. I was exhausted that whole week because it was all I could think of and I was stressed. Either way, I was gonna be homeless and living on the street in 30 days. I had a decision to make.

So with that, I chose to take a shot at Los Angeles, California. I had weighed all my options and came to the conclusion I was going to Los Angeles. My landlord, got extremely mad but then he saw it as a way to get out of pressing charges on me and paid for the ticket. So with that, I went. And Now I am writing this as I am on my way to California. I am scared and I am happy at the same time. I know this could be great or not. But I am taking my chances. So, Hollywood California here we come!

 

The Letter I wrote to My mom and Dad 2 weeks ago

So, two weeks ago I sent this email out to my parents. I never got a reply. I just resent it hoping they will reply. I don’t expect it but it’s worth a try! I kept it G-Rated…haha.

“Hi Mom and Dad,

It’s Jonathan =) Just thought I would write to y’all and let y’all know what’s been up with me lately. Well, as you guys know I got into college and I am about finished up with the semester!! I have averaged a B in my grades (which is above average) and I am looking forward to moving on to the next semester! This semester was really good for me, as I did take three classes this semester with 7 credits (Math 097: Basic Algebra and mathematics, MUS 189: College Choir, and CLS 100 Introduction to college studies). My next semester is planned in five classes: MUS 120: Introduction to Piano, MUS 112: Basic Music Theory, MUS 189: College Choir, MUS 151: Applied Non Music Major (These are the vocal lessons), and lastly MUS 103: Applied Performance Class (This is the class I Have at the end of the month when I appear to the jury for them to judge whether I move up to the next level in music lessons).
So that is the plan for my next semester. I am very excited and thrilled I will be learning music and piano. I took pre-requisites this ending semester (fall 2013) and did very well as mentioned before (I received a B either way because tomorrow I take the final in Math 097 and I am quite confident I can pass it). Choir has been fun and Is graded on attendance. I never miss choir because it is so fun and I’ve grown to master my vocal range somewhat (I am a First Tenor in training). We had our first concert October 13 and performed Les Miserables and Bridge Over Troubled Water. It was fun!!! I was nervous because it was my first concert performing but I performed quite well and am looking forward to our next concert which is December 9th!
So yeah, I also have a part time job with workstudy working with the music department. 15 hours a week and it isn’t a hard job at all! I also am anticipating on recording a Christmas album soon (not professional, but a demo) and I also am trying to plan on going to America’s Got Talent Summer 2014 (as I have the option to take the summer off). I am working on developing this talent and totally am pursuing my dream to become a popstar!
But I am not perfect and I’m not trying to paint a perfect picture. By all means, I still face problems. For one, I recently had to admit I’m an alcoholic because I was drinking like crazy. I also got into debt by $400 but I quickly repaid it back (I won’t say how, but let’s just say I stopped doing that because Jesus spoke to me). I’ve been raped. I’ve been accused of many things too. I struggle too. All my money I make now goes for a place to stay and my phone bill. I struggle hard because I don’t have parents to support me (*but that’s ok tho*). Amazingly through all my stress and hurt and pain, I still pass in school and get good grades. That’s because I’ve set my priorities straight and I DEEPLY care about my future.
Yes, I believe in Jesus and God and I attend church regularly on sundays. I also am part of the young adult/college life ministry and the pastor has connected with me. It’s good living here in Grand Rapids, Michigan and Attending Grand Rapids Community College. I will be earning my Associates Degree in Music.
Mom, if u read this I just wanted to let you know that what you taught me about cleaning and cooking is being used quite well and I am very clean and still cook a lot ❤ . When people ask me how I know how to do so many good things I was always tell them to thank my mom. Haha. I love u and I still care. I wanna see u but whatever. soon enough I guess.
Well Thanksgiving is a week away and I hope y’all enjoy it! I will miss everyone and be thinking of u guys but it is what it is. I’ve forgiven y’all and I pray everyday that Jesus will change your hearts and let me back in. It hurts and I cry so many times and I’ve been suicidal before about it but I have learned to let go (altho family movies and some memories triggered do get me depressed sometimes and I cry a lot,). I wrote a song about the pain and that helps too. I don’t hate y’all. I don’t dislike y’all. I know I am still gay.
Infact, I am still looking for the right man to marry. I’ve been through a lot of breakups and stuff but I still look for the right man that would wanna marry me and adopt kids and make a family. A man that will accept me for who I am. It’s hard tho because all the men in Grand Rapids are whores but I still try. It’s all about patience tho.
well, I need to go and do some things. Hope you read this mom. And dad. Reply back please?
Happy Thanksgiving and Happy Holidays ❤
Love,
Jonathan Stephen Fisher
NEW: I HAVE BEEN INTO PHOTOGRAPHY TOO! CHECK IT OUT! Thanks!
I hope they reply soon!

Weekend

It’s the weekend and I’m sitting here in the kitchen just staring at my computer racking my brain for things to do. Yesterday was fun for me because I slept all day and then went to a gamer’s convention at 3  pm. I only stayed there for an hour and then went home and cooked dinner. Dinner was orange chicken (I don’t know what’s gotten into me, but I’ve been eating a lot of Chinese food lately) and then I decided to go to bed again. I slept till about 1am and then I woke up and goofed around on my computer.

I was just Facebook my friends and checking my A4A (adam4adam)  to see if I was to get any hookups for the night (I wasn’t looking for a hookup per se. I was more like looking for a cuddle buddy to fall asleep in his arms). Needless to say, I got nothing that last night and went to bed feeling alone again. I mean, like there was this one guy by the name of Steve who was all into me and talking to me but sadly this morning when I woke up he told me he wasn’t a christian and so I said we weren’t gonna work out because I need a christian man who is gonna encourage me to grow in God and go to church with me.  I can’t marry a man who  is gonna drive me away from God and Jesus. This is one thing that I will only require of my man.

So yeah, I fell asleep alone. Lately, I’ve been feeling lonely. Wishing I hadn’t broke up with some of my exes because then they would be there for me when I have these spurts. I just need someone I can call my own and love and care for. A man who is gonna hold me in his arms ans reassure me that everything is gonna be ok. A masculine man who is dominant in the bed and very confident in himself. A man with a loving heart and a caring mind. A man who can handle me and love me for who I am rather than just sexual. I mean, I want my man to want me sexually but I don’t want that to be all of it. I want a heart to heart connection. I want that burning passion for each other to see each other succeed and pursue our dreams. A man who will love me for who I am and encourage me to grow not only in my religious views, but in my Career and mental stability.  A man who I can be there for and give him anything he wants and be his “bitch” (there are some exceptions to this term, but i think he will get it). A man who will love it when I cook, clean, and organize for him. A man who wants to adopt kids one day and make a family. A man who appreciates family and relationships. I want a manly man.

So there you have it. There is what I need in a man and what I look for (the whole total jest of it? probably). Will I ever find him? Will he find me? After-all, what is it a guy can find in me? I’m not gonna go over that list cause well, he can figure out if I’m right for him. Lately I’ve just been needing a cuddle buddy to cuddle up with. I wanna be romantic again. I wanna kiss my man when he gets home from work. I wanna cuddle up in bed with my man every night and hold him close to me and tell him I love him. I wanna hold hands with him while walking out in public. I wanna make him dinner and spoil him to death. I wanna do his laundry and make his bed and be his wife. I wanna love again. I wanna listen to him and talk to him. I wanna give him passionate hugs and kisses and be passionate in the bedroom. I want to go to church with him and pray with him. I wanna read the Word with him and talk about Jesus. I just want a man to love and I want to be romantic again.

So yeah, that’s how I’ve been feeling lately when I go to bed. I cry about it sometimes because I don’t know if I’ll ever find my other half. All these guys I’ve been seeing all just want me for one thing: sex. They see I’m attractive with a nice bubble butt and a nice package and they just wanna go down on me. Seriously, sex is really getting boring for me because I want more. I cry because it seems like no guys want real love. Well, I’m sorry. I’m not a sex toy. Ya know, it kinda pisses me off too. Like this morning when I told Steve that I didn’t think we were gonna work out he was like “Well, can we fuck at least”. I was just about to scream!! I just texted him and told him I’m not a sex toy. But seriously that disgusted me! Like I am not a sex toy and I am worth more than that! Seriously I should’ve seen that coming tho. Most men have interior motives like that. Gah!

So yeah, I did something nice today actually. I helped my room mate Norm put up the Christmas lights and decorations in his front yard. I was so happy when I did this because  it means Christmas is finally here and it’s time to put my christmas cheer on! I am excited! I even recorded a video this morning with me singing “Let It Snow”

Yeah. I just been In the Holiday Mood lately too. Listening to Christmas Music on Spotify and singing along with it. The other day I was at work just playing my music out loud and my boss was happy to hear it was Christmas music. She just looked at me and asked me to turn it up. So I did just that.  I love Christmastime! It brings me so much joy with all the Christmas caroling and beautiful young kids talking about Santa (no, I don’t believe in Santa, but it’s cute when kids talk about it). The beautiful gift wrappings are nice too. Christmas makes me happy! My favorite Christmas Carol is “Carol of The Bells”. I’ve heard many versions of it but I’ve got to say My Favorite of them all is the one done by “Celtic Woman”.

So anyways, I need to go, but I though I’d share what’s been on my mind. Happy Holidays!!

-Jonathan S Fisher

Pianist Needed in Grand Rapids, MI

Hi! My name is Jonathan S Fisher and I am a Second Tenor voice range looking for a pianist to accompany me and wanna help me sing. I’m currently a music major at GRCC and am a performer in the College Choir. I’m looking for a professional pianist to meet up with twice a week (maybe on the weekends) to do whatever (Sing a few songs and stretch my voice solo (choir is ok but I never get to hear just myself!). I only have two pieces of music but maybe you could bring a few pieces yourself and we can work it out) (With Christmas coming up, I can see us doing a whole concert with this).
Hit me up and we can see what we can work out! Thanks!
*No compensation.

piano 2 piano